The cucumber is a cautious vegetable
Not given to audacious schemes
Its growth obeys the laws of botany
Joys and sorrows has it not any
But sometimes it dreams
The salmon is a bold adventurer
Plunging far up distant streams
On and on it swims victorious
Laboriously glorious
But sometimes it dreams
The cucumber struggles through the foam
The salmon snuggles down in loam
Alas! These dreams can never be
They only meet when I have tea
This piece is from the Verse section — see more Verse →
“Life kills.” – JCL
Apart from that quote, here are the prices for items for sale on this site, plus VAT and p&p at cost. All the books are first editions, and can be signed, dedicated and sent as gifts. The Ugly Baby and Speaky Stuff are available immediately in the UK, other items from June 2025.
Peculiar Poems. Very rare. 82 pages, cardboard covers, published in Bucharest in 1990 by Editura Babel, and printed by the Bucharest University Press. ISBN 973-48-1003-0. This was one of the first books to be published after the Romanian Revolution of December 1989. Good condition but some slight mottling to end pages. 21 copies left from a run of 100. £50.
The Ugly Baby. Soft covers, 385 pages. Published by Ediciones Trilce for Poor Tree Press and printed by Gráfica Don Bosco in Montevideo in 2007. ISBN 978-9974-32-443-5. Compendium volume containing the poems from nine self-published booklets, now unavailable: Peculiar Poems, Crispy Postmen, Love-Making in the Home, Why Dogs Hate Croquet, How to Hug, The Lord’s Tears, Snoud and Rufy, Shaggy Doggerel and the Coolibah Tree. Illustrated by the author. About 200 copies left from a run of 1000. £20.
Speaky Stuff. Soft covers, 334 pages. Published in 2023 by Mastergraf of Montevideo, ISBN 978-9915-411-9-4. Contains 65 comedy performance pieces for speeches, shows and auditions, and three stage comedies with manageable casts for touring and amdram groups. Illustrated by the author. About 180 copies left from a run of 300. £15.
Backgammon checkers in stainless steel and hide (to customer’s colour specification) or beech and Patagonian rosewood. Tournament size, 44mm x 10mm. £6 each.
Doubleyou (W) dice game, using leather and hardwood. Includes dice, cube and shaker. £29.
Clockapult delayed action sucker dart catapult/games timer. £19.
Montevideo free-standing croquet hoops. Not currently in production, seeking UK manufacturer, would take small commission.